The Voice in My Ear
by lightningbugg74
Summary: About Clark in that episode before he comes home. I think it's called "Exile". Please enjoy and Reveiw


MN-SS: Okay, my newest one… gah!!! I do not want to do this as a first-person from Clark's POV, but I can't think of another way to do it!!! *sad*  I love sad stories… heh this is more of angst, but who's caring anyway? Um… loosely based on the episode 'Exile' from the… fourth season, is it? 

Anyway, Smallville doesn't belong to me… I think it belongs to the WB, but I'm gonna look around for a Clark Kent muse (especially with glasses) XD!!!!

The Voice in My Ear 

Walking out of Atlantis, I think about that girl I brought with me today.  She tried to get to my mark.  My scar.  She should have listened and not touched it.  Good God, I don't even know her name.  I kissed her.  We kissed.  But it wasn't the same.  It wasn't Lana.  I didn't love her. I didn't feel a thing, but there I was, kissing a girl I didn't even know.  I don't care anymore. 

Suddenly, it burns.  It just kills me, burning into my chest.  I feel like I'm on fire.  I have to stop it.  It'll kill me. I know it'll just devour me; not that it'll matter.  Dad hates me for what I did.  It was an accident.  The ring… it has to come off.  My breathing quickens. Someone's going see me.  Pain… all I feel is pain.  _Stop! Make it stop!_ I finally pull off the red kryptonite ring.  

I realize where I am.  A telephone booth. I could call home.  I could call mom.  I could say that I'm sorry.  I could… What exactly would I say?  Would they forgive me?  Would they even care? Do they even miss me? Tears form in my eyes.  Maybe it would be better if I didn't call.  If they didn't care, what would I say? I've got to do something, but maybe calling isn't the best off all ideas.  Still, my fingers dial the numbers to my house and the phone rings in my ear.

She picks it up.  My mom.  I hear her words echo in my ear.  "Clark? Clark, is that you?" I remain silent, just breathing.  I knew this would happen.  What can I say to the person whose baby **I** killed? "Clark, please come home." Something warm rolls down my cheek.  What am I supposed to say?  Was I supposed to answer her?  She sounded so desperate.  Could I really come home, or was it just another lie?  

She pleads with me for the next couple minutes.  Maybe it was an hour.  I couldn't tell. Did she really care about me, after the baby…?  I couldn't talk.  My vocal chords were stuck.  My head screamed at me.  _'Say something, you idiot! After all you've done as an idiot, she deserves an apology!'_ But I couldn't.  I couldn't say, "I love you."  I couldn't say, "I'm sorry." All because I'm a weakling. Because I heard her voice in my ear.  

I just breathe.  I stand in a telephone booth, and I breathe.  I don't do anything else.  She became silent again.  I swear I wanted to say something to her.  I wanted to tell her I'd come home.  I wanted to tell her how sorry I was, for killing the baby. For leaving.  For existing.  "Clark…" She tries to start, but the word is the last in her sentence as she trails off.  Like me, she doesn't know what to say.  But still, she was able to say she cared.  "Clark," she starts again, "please come home.  I want you to know: your father and I love you very much."

That's it.  I can't say anything, but she was able to tell me she still loved me.  How could anyone even care? I bet Lana didn't care.  Pete probably had forgotten about me already.  Chloe… Chloe… after what I did, it was doubtful she would even look at me.  Mom and Dad would forget; I am the 'son' that so kindly returned the favor of them caring for me by killing their to-be born son. From now on, Smallville is my past.  I'm never going back to that rat-trap ever again.  I'll erase it from my memory and I will never care about it ever again.  

So I slammed the phone back onto the cradle.  I hung up on the one person who would ever totally care about me… other than dad of course.  They wouldn't care anymore.  They'll forget about the black-haired boy that silently trundled into their life after they almost died from that car accident.  I couldn't forget though, even if they ever did… I slid down the side of the booth and sat on the ground. My eyes leaked with water.  _What have I done… What have I done… I should be home.  Where I belong…_ Mom and dad… on the road … I'll never forget _that_ day.

~~~~

The meteors showered down on the small city of Smallville, Kansas.  An old red truck raced down the road, trying to get away from the giant falling rocks.  A couple nervously sat in the cab, wishing they were safely at home, than out in this firestorm of rocks.  The woman suddenly screamed, noticing a roadblock made by on of the giant rocks.  The man swerved the car off the road and it flipped over.  

They made sure they were all right and the man looked out the side of his window.  Since they were buckled in, the couple was hanging upside down in the cab of their car.  Upside down, they saw a little black-haired boy squatting by the overturned car.  This was the baby they always had wanted!  This was the little boy they could never have.  They managed to crawl out of the truck and the lady pulled out a blanket to wrap the naked boy in. She was Martha Kent and her husband, Jonathan Kent. The boy was Clark Kent.

~~~~

Unsteadily, I got home.  I'm not sure how I made it home alive, but I was here.  This place had become my home, an apartment overlooking Metropolis.  Off in the distance, I can see the touches of countryside.  Where I come from.  I sit down on the bed and wonder what would have happened if I never had left the farm.  The bright lights of this city pulled me in.  They didn't let go of me, either.  I've become someone else.  I'm not Clark Kent anymore, I'm Cal.  But honestly, what's the difference? Just a name.  Underneath is the same high-school kid who can run fast, is really strong, can look through solid objects, burn things by just looking at them, and do other stuff normal people can't. 

I'm still Clark… Cal is no different. I make myself laugh sometimes.  I'm just lost, but I'll have to find my way home sometime soon.  Before I sleep, I place my ring on my bedside table.  As I drift to sleep, I feel a warm tear slip down my cheek.  Everything's going wrong.  I don't know where I belong anymore, but I can't go home… where ever that is.  At least I heard my mother tonight.  At least I know she still cares about me a bit. But where am I ever going to belong?

~End

MN-SS: *sniffle* I AM SO SORRY!! WAAHHH!!! *very sad* I'm so sorry Clark-chan.  But I watched 'Exile' and 'Phoenix' like… two weeks ago and it's been on my mind for a while… Wah!! I'm so sad that I had to torture Clark now…*teary-eyed* 

Kagze: Hey there… Tifanie, it's okay. Calm down.

MN-SS: I know, Kagze, but I just- *snaps out of sadness* Wait, what are you doing here? You're supposed to only be in fictionpress.com.

Kagze: Uh… you're right, I don't really know how I got here.  Heh, well, I guess no I jump dimensions.  

MN-SS: Well, I guess I'll get over it, but I'M SO SORRY!!!! But now… I'm gonna find me a nice Clark Kent muse *runs off*

Kagze: Well, since she forgot to say this, please review… o yea, Tifanie's in absolute love with Clark Kent a.k.a. Tom Welling.  It's really funny… eep… I shouldn'ta said that. :P Bye everyone!


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